Dear Apartment,
I have noticed that you have been falling below par lately. I do not mean disrespect, but I overlooked your paper-thin walls and grimy disposition at first. However, your recent development of black mold makes me feel wiggly inside. Your walls are deformed, you have a smokey-cat aroma, and we neither smoke nor do we have cats. Now the last comment is in no way your fault, but the creepy old man who seeks my attention and tells me he "watches me" then follows me around, has really tipped me off my rocker.
Sincerely,
Janelle
Dear House,
Thanks for being on sale for such a reasonable price. Please be mine and tell your friends at the bank to hurry, before I turn up in a garbage can in Nebraska (courtesy of the pervert neighbor).
Love always,
Janelle
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5 comments:
YIKES, we do not miss it. We'll pray that the bank also reads your blog and will push your loan through.
Ummm...if you need to live with us until your loan comes through please feel free! :) Sounds like you might need some pepper spray if you don't! :) Keep us posted
Are we old enough to be buying houses?
You should explain to this neighbor that a large Norwegian woman is going to kick his trash if he doesn't leave you alone.
Oh please, please, please let your loan go through so you can be only 3 minutes from us!!
Plus then we can go get you a puppy!!:)
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